Super Mario Bros. The Movie – Movie Review – Episode 9

The gang straps in for an 8 bit barrage of utter shit in the form of movie adaptations of some of your most treasured video games; in particular Super Mario Bros. from 1993.  We try to answers some of the most striking questions from the film like can you really trust the fungus and did this movie slowly kill Bob Hoskins.  So grab your Powerglove (It’s sooo bad!) and a mushroom or two as we dive into the world of horrible video game movies!

Movie News!

Super Mario Bros. – Key Points

  • Video Game Bonafides 
    • John had a very typical upbringing going from the Nintendo NES, Super Nintendo, Genesis, Sega CD, etc.
    • Elaine unfortunately lived a very video game deprived childhood and had to survive on the crumbs of computer games.
    • Brian went from NES, to Genesis, and then to the monstrosity that was the 32X- the male enhancement drug for the Sega Genesis.
    • Also, that fucking dog in Duck Hunt is the devil.
  • What’s with the Dinosaur Obsession?
    • Super Mario Bros. dips into the trend in the early 90’s of everything revolving around dinosaurs which seemed to climax around the release of Jurassic Park in the same year.
  • This film has absolutely nothing to do with the video game.  
    • Aside from King Koopa stealing The Princess, the plot revolves around some meteorite that split the dimensions into our world and a dystopian dino obsessed world called Dinohatten and Koopa’s desire to merge the dimensions using a piece of the meteorite…….still with me?
    • This movie was so bad that Nintendo to this day refuses to license their games for movie adaptations.
    • Bob Hoskins did not know that Mario was a video game character and he was injured multiple times on set.
      • He was electrocuted, broke a finger, and nearly drowned.
    • Trust the fungus–the real hero of the movie is a liquid latex looking fungus played by Lance Hendriksen of Pumpkinhead fame
  • Video game movies are extremely difficult to adapt to films.  
    • The early games plots were simplistic button mashers which forced studios to create plots that ultimately had very little to do with the games themselves.
    • Games nowadays have an easier time transitioning to film since the games themselves are now as fleshed out as most movies with complex characters and elaborate plots.  Think of games like The Last of Us, LA Noir, and Uncharted.

Notable Movies Referenced

super mario bros
Super Mario Bros. (1993)
mortal kombat
Mortal Kombat (1995)
street fighter
Street Fighter (1994)

 

 

NEXT WEEK:

We add one of the most offensive films on the planet to The Pantheon of Utter Shit- TipToes

Check out the trailer below!!

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